Worst times of my Life

Oh, I don't even know what's buried me! Two weeks ago, I was coasting along quietly, minding my own business when all of a sudden a ton of problems came crashing down from out of the blue. Okay, so maybe my problems would seem so little compared to what other people may have, but they're problems non the less, and they're stressing me out so badly. Sometimes I feel so depressed that I don't even want to get out of bed. And that's unusual; I mostly like waking up and getting up in the mornings.

Days are a drag. They really are.

I think it all started a last week when I received a whole shift for my work from 10: 30 to 6:30. My Dad began scolding me about how my work will interfere with my studies and my marks will go down. It gets me really pissed off when he just assumes things like that? Why would he even assume that my grades would go down? Doesn't he have enough faith in what I can do? I guess not. I don't think he believes in anything my sister and I do. Way to go... besides, I still blame him for making me send out my resumees in the first place. So technically, it was his fault that I have this job.

But what's more infuriating is the fact that times don't seem to go along with what I plan. I plan to study and work really really hard so that I would be able to achieve at least the same marks that I did last time, but it doesn't seem to work out that way. No matter how much I try to do better (especially in math) there would always be something to catch me off guard and pull me back down. I don't know what it is with my math teacher when he gives us test and quiz questions that I've never seen before. How am I supposed to know how to do that? It's so frustrating! I dropped 20% with my tests already, and I can't seem to be able to catch up. I just wrote my last quiz for the course today, and I didn't even seem to score a hundred. Do you think that asking for a perfect score is too much? Most people will think so, but I don't. Many people in my class can. Even if I get a hundred percent for my next test (which is impossible), I still wouldn't be able to have the same grade unless I score a perfect on my exam (which is again, impossible). Why do times need to be like this just when I need luck on my side?

Other things that came crashing down? Well, a business ISU and two new Careers project. I usually am able to get perfect on the Civics tests, but when I got to Careers, I've never had a perfect just yet. I don't want my average to go down with this subject as well, or else I'm permanently doomed. I don't want to be doomed! Nobody wants to be doomed! My business ISU is due tomorrow. I have to go memorize and practice my lines, and I really need to get at least a perfect on this project. It's a team project, and it really doesn't depend on me alone to achieve this goal. I wonder how my other team mates will do.

I don't have too much of a problem with Careers and Computers, but effort is still needed badly. I have to work so hard for all of this subjects, and what do I get? Nothing! Absolutely nothing! Nothing for my hard work! Gosh... I'm overly depressed. Yeah, I know; I probably don't know the meaning of hard work yet, but as of right now... this is hard work. This is hard work for me, and I'm getting nothing back for my efforts. Ever know how that feels? It feels horrible. It feels like my stomach is going to spurt out of my mouth, along with my heart and my brains. I think I'm getting used to the feeling that I'm almost enjoying it. Of course, that would never happen. I would never enjoy disappointment. I try not to do that; I owe it to even myself.